I have been working with my coach on my confidence. This may sound an odd thing, as I am pretty gregarious – but that does not always mean I am confident! One of the things she suggested was writing letters which never get sent. These were addressed to three people who had caused me some upset in my life.
I dutifully wrote my three letters, but then I had another conversation with someone else about writing a letter to myself. This is my letter…
Dear Me,
Yes, I am going to write you a letter too. It may end up in smoke, but hey this needs to be done. You, yes you need to put yourself first! STOP Being all things to all men when you can’t be all things to you.
You are no less worthy than anyone else. You deserve to be happy and fulfilled. For too long it’s been about everyone else and it needs to stop.
Think about what makes your soul sing, follow the dream. Hell, you need to allow yourself to dream! What would you do if you had total freedom? You don’t know, do you? You’ve become so disconnected from the voice inside. You need to hear her sing.
The people who called you thick, stupid and lazy were jealous of your light shining bright. They tried to dim your glow. They had a bloody good go, but there is still light there.
How many times did you have a great idea, only for it to be quashed by something someone else put in your head. How many times did you talk yourself out of something which you wanted to do or be? You have just one life, nothing is permanent, we all leave these bodies. Why not make the most of it?
You need to be at the centre of your own world, you need to come first. The others will wait if they care for you! Be who you were meant to be, not who people want you to be. It will never and well and never make your heart sing!
This is not all that I will write to myself, but it is all that I want to share here.
Writing letters you’ll never send is a powerful tool in coaching. Physically writing them down is a great way to offload. I did actually write all this, then type it up btw! I am sure this is something which I’ll keep coming back too. After all, how much do we all hold on too? There are things which we feel we need to say, but should never see the light of day – or is that just me?
Not Middle Aged 